How to Pick Pockets (in galleries & festivals)
by mr.lowercase
5th edition edited by pg.paint

*in accordance with right of way laws in L.A., the latest edition has subtracted significant seconds off of your escape route.

Chapters still include great classics like:

Buy your own art with their money.
buy a billboard and a sattelllitte with the booty.
pay someone to make undeniably good stuff for you
pay someone to give you a checklist of "taste"
pay someone for common sense
spend more time reading and less time making
fret for your future less
feel understood
feel appreciated
publish your own history book ahead of time!(see fret for future less)
make lots of money
validate yourself with power
influence culture NOW!
learn the "i told you so" silent smirk that doesn't burn bridges
learn to differentiate between culture and cultured
10 convenient expressions for conversing with the rich and how to make them ignore your shoes!
all for 49.99