
taking pictures. writing books.writing essays. playing songs. cooking chicken. choking chicken. picking nose. writing art reviews. popping zits. thinking about reading. seeing books. seeing pictures. browsing pages. writing poems. taking medicine.researching all over the place. wondering about drugs. wandering about. looking at plants. looking at wasps. looking at paintings. laying down. reading essays. reading fiction.feeling fat. reading poems.feeling old. writing poems.feling bald. writing on blogs. talking to friends on the phone. thinking about talking to friends on the phone. tentatively cooresponding with artists. writing about artists. imagining plots. short stories. novels. poems. poems with plots. poems in pieces scattered on a construction site. grasping for meaniing by discussing meaning. realizing i cant focus. making not focused focused wont work. thinking about work. scared. jealous.looking at bills. wondering if i forgot a bill. lonely. excited. inspired. horny. depressed. suicidal. hungry. curious. hearing words to write.trying to not think about the fact i am using the internet. thinking about the internet as a community. thinking about the internet as a valuable context. thinking about family. thinking about angry things. creating angry things from nowhere. not crying. not laughing. realizing it's a blur.realizing that the internet is a thing,a piece of art itself.thinking about how there are concepts beyond me. thinking maybe i should not even try. thinking maybe there is genius in recognizing ones own limits. realizing how removed thoughts and presence seem in retrospect. thinking back in terms of months or hours.thinking about work. not thinking about thinking about money. afraid for future.not ggettng moved too much by anything. mimicking emotion it would seem. remembering. projecting. bitching. not listening to others. listening to others. curious to create consistantly. drinking coffee. changing music to something not so sad but atmospheric. adjusting lighting. looking at potential art materials. seeing everything as potential art materials. seeing nothing as potential art materials. feeling too many options. feeling like boxing up belongings to move. thinking about artists i admire. thinking about real people and making them less than something. thinking about parents. Thinking about writing a book. thinking about poets i now and how the stuff written by this writer is no good. realizing what good is. caught in a cycle of self awareness that starts off outward but ends up very inward. gargling hydrogen peroxide. playing with pieces of my broken tooth. taking pictures. loading pictures on computer. writing e-mails on the internet. imagining conversations. replaying conversations. imagining people. looking at trees. looking at squirrels. thinking about people who needing a respectful phone call. thinking about exercise. thinking about unhealthy food. thinking about a thankfulness for being beyond cigarettes. craving a cigarette,but not really. recalling driving habits. conscious of the time. adjusting glasses on bridge of nose. feeling sweaty. aware of cleanliness of environment. aware of disorganization. aware of a song's abrasive moments. dirty clothes in a red chair.black vinyl text on acetate rattled by a box fan. paintings on mdo plywood age. back hurts. fingers type. thoughts become sluggish. becoming self aware. i am self aware. i am trying to type thoughts. i am typing thoughts.liking a moment in a song. feeling it make me feel. for a second.thinking maybe i will try to organize myself.realizing i have tried that before. realizing i have tried that before. realizing that it what it is. thinkng i will organize my thoughts.thinking i will organize my reality. thinking i will do.
taking pictures.
writing books.
writing essays.
playing songs.
cooking chicken.
choking chicken.
picking nose.
writing art reviews.
popping zits.
thinking about reading.
seeing books.
seeing pictures.
browsing pages.
writing poems.
taking medicine.
researching all over the place.
wondering about drugs.
wandering about.
looking at plants.
looking at wasps.
looking at paintings.
laying down.
reading essays.
reading fiction.
feeling fat.
reading poems.
feeling old.
writing poems.
feeling bald.
writing on blogs.
talking to friends on the phone.
thinking about talking to friends on the phone.
tentatively cooresponding with artists.
writing about artists.
imagining plots.
short stories.
novels.
poems.
poems with plots.
poems in pieces scattered on a construction site.
grasping for meaning by discussing meaning.
realizing i cant focus.
making not focused focused wont work.
thinking about work.
scared.
jealous.
looking at bills.
wondering if i forgot a bill.
lonely.
excited.
inspired.
horny.
depressed.
suicidal.
hungry.
curious.
hearing words to write.
trying to not think about the fact i am using the internet.
thinking about the internet as a community.
thinking about the internet as a valuable context.
thinking about family.
thinking about angry things.
creating angry things from nowhere.
not crying.
not laughing.
realizing it's a blur.
realizing that the internet is a thing,a piece of art itself.
thinking about how there are concepts beyond me.
thinking maybe i should not even try.
thinking maybe there is genius in recognizing ones own limits.
realizing how removed thoughts and presence seem in retrospect.
thinking back in terms of months or hours.
thinking about work.
not thinking about thinking about money.
afraid for future.
not gettng moved too much by anything.
mimicking emotion it would seem.
remembering.
projecting.
bitching.
not listening to others.
listening to others.
curious to create consistantly.
drinking coffee.
changing music to something not so sad but atmospheric.
adjusting lighting.
looking at potential art materials.
seeing everything as potential art materials.
seeing nothing as potential art materials.
feeling too many options.
feeling like boxing up belongings to move.
thinking about artists i admire.
thinking about real people and making them less than something.
thinking about parents.
Thinking about writing a book.
thinking about poets i know and how the stuff written by this writer is no good. realizing what good is.
caught in a cycle of self awareness that starts off outward but ends up very inward. gargling hydrogen peroxide.
playing with pieces of my broken tooth.
taking pictures.
loading pictures on computer.
writing e-mails on the internet.
imagining conversations.
replaying conversations.
imagining people.
looking at trees.
looking at squirrels.
thinking about people who needing a respectful phone call.
thinking about exercise.
thinking about unhealthy food.
thinking about a thankfulness for being beyond cigarettes.
craving a cigarette,but not really.
recalling driving habits.
conscious of the time.
adjusting glasses on bridge of nose.
feeling sweaty.
aware of cleanliness of environment.
aware of disorganization.
aware of a song's abrasive moments.
dirty clothes in a red chair.
black vinyl text on acetate rattled by a box fan.
paintings on mdo plywood age.
back hurts.
fingers type.
thoughts become sluggish.
becoming self aware. i am self aware.
i am trying to type thoughts.
i am typing thoughts.
liking a moment in a song.
feeling it make me feel.
for a second.
thinking maybe i will try to organize myself.
realizing i have tried that before.
realizing i have tried that before.
realizing that it what it is.
thinking i will organize my thoughts.
thinking i will organize my reality.
thinking i will do.