On Apr 2, 2006, at 1:14 PM, Jeff d wrote:
> no not necessarilly racist.
> one time when i was in 4th grade.... i idolized my older brother,
> right, he was in seventh and as cool as sliced bread. he had older
> friends in the neighborhood and i attempted to run with them,
> consequently having a retarded pace of emotional maturity. i learned
> stuff i wasnt supposed to. a penny for the young guy? i cursed like a
> sailor when i was 10 and didnt know what the flip i was sayin'.
> anyways..i go tto show and tell at school. Rehoboth Elementary.
> i tell a story about yard football game with neighborhood
> friends....jesus why am i submitting this? this really belongs on a
> blog, cedric. sorry. pah haaah!(prob has me on block anyways). during
> the football game clothing was torn and things got rough, and i caught
> a part of a joke regarding the word "rape" and it amused me. i think
> the word "rape" sounding like "rake" had an interesting
> association/connotation to my 10 ,11 yr old mind.hell..i dunno.
> i go to school for show and tell( i wanted a peanut butter scratch and
> sniff for my art class folder) and recount my version of the football
> game and utilize my new word.
> was great. i think my face is still kinda red and swollen to this day.
> point of all this? loosen up? there i go bein' presumptuous.
> P1d2o3b at aol.com wrote:
> That was very brave. I didn't see the post you're responding to and I
> need to be not reading artnews posts, but getting some stuff done,
> but as someone who often -- formerly more often -- made myself
> vulnerable to invite others to do likewise, I hear the call of duty
> and respond.
> I presume you're talking about mortifying public expressions of
> racism? I have two awful ones. The first, I committed like yours not
> meaning the exaggerated racism I was mouthing as an in joke among
> fellow "enlightened" white southerners standing in the chow line with
> at a most prestigious yankee law school about 1958, with a blinddate,
> a fellow southerner had fixed me up with, conscious that people were
> listening to the Southerners' talk among ourselves. We yankee
> school Texans then had a Boots in Boston, Ivy in Irvine cult of
> dressing, talking, eating and saying the most outrageous things we
> could think of to feed prejudices about us. In a similar situation
> with a date from Texas, (not I note with 40 year hindsight, at the law
> school and not the nephew with the same last name as a judge on the
> 5th circuit then making civil rights history) my date had said 'My
> dad caught a wetback back on the lower 40." "Did he kill'im?" That
> was my line. "No, just shot 'im in the leg and made him walk back to
> camp." So when someone in our group said, "Integration wouldn't be a
> problem, if their intelligence were as high as ours," I chipped in,
> "and if they didn't smell so bad."
> My other mortifying remark was saying we'd be japped by the FBI if we
> did something at an anti Vietnam war SDS conference in the 60's.
> Btw, what you're asking people to do is sort of what my for whites
> only installation in the Strange Fruit show at Eyedrum 2001 (or 2?)
> was attempting in asking people to write their most recent racist
> thought and put it in a Dixie cup buried in the Labyrinth of Rue. The
> virus mutates and vaccinations against past strains are ineffective
> against new ones. It's not just
> white supremacy, it's any us-they with physical signals to prejudge
> who is expected to boss or be bossed.
> In a message dated 4/2/2006 9::55 A.M. Central Daylight Time,
> eggtoothjeff at yahoo.com writes:
> Anne and whom (who?) ever
> howdy anne. i am thinking that perhaps, ya know, the people here in
> Atlanta,at least on the list and otherwise, would not mind hearing
> some more stories and such regarding the Atlanta Artwork Coalition.
> would former members care to pipe up with anecdotes...perhaps applying
> a state of mind that is reminiscent,but also forward thinking. at the
> very least neutral. because negative comparisons to the state of
> things now may or may not be true and would only serve to perpetuate a
> negative whirlwind.
> An used the words "social scene" in her email.
> what does this bring to mind for you's guys?
> i am curious how we view the idea of "us together".
> is it peniless intellects stirring tea and having guarded wall-eyed
> is it college educated business co. schmoes with lots of money and
> only the ability to mimic confidence and interest? nodding smiling
> is it spirtuallly fuzzy warm and floaty earthy philosophical circles
> of circles of peace loving long hairs?
> is it Ehiopian?S Amrican? Iraqi? Bosnian? Mexican? Vietnamese?
> a mixture? wil there be music? and memeber sof the opposite sex(same
> sex?) to bird dog?
> does the social scene require us to like each other? or does it just
> require unity under a specified simplified goal? one goal at a time?
> yeah right....
> so heres the deal.
> lets all post an amusing embarrassing anecdote(yes that word again)
> recounting something that enduced mortification. dam that sounded
> good.hope it's a word
> doctor...start enducing mortification right away!
> in public?
> with a camera and a megaphone.
> is th esocial scene for those of culture, age and wisdom and proper
> ettiquette and the ability to spell the word ettiquette?
> and crikey. how political does it have to be? when i say political,
> imean having heated conversations that essentially tap and red herring
> a bunch of extreme cases of individuality. so they go home and write
> or make art.
> but anyways embarrasing stories.
> here's mine:
> when i walked into friends house in 1992-Inoticed some african
> americans gathered in the front room with chris burke scott heron,
> mike wallace and the likes. his name was "snapper". this was in Rose
> Bigelow's house in tucker. lots of drugs andparties at this time in my
> life. just not in me or aroundme. yeah....
> SNAPPER WAS WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND.oops.
> snapper was with his girlfriend at the time. i think. but anyways.
> here's Jeff. walks in passes through front room and goes to back
> living room, turns around and there's chris burke. what does jeff
> say(thinking he is cute and dry with wit)
> "what are these niggers doing here?"
> yep. i said it. chris played along with my whiteboy ignorance, my
> suburban north dekalb mall mentality.everybody else was more forward
> in thought....?
> now i was smart enough to know better. i just thought the obvious
> brutality of the statement (question) was humorous. at least my memory
> tells me that was how and why i said it. i will not deny the ironic
> mixture of my mind at ages 12 to 16. love jesus. hate others. yeah
> baby! in 92 i was 20, though, well it happened circa 92...maybe 90.
> kurdt was still alive, man.
> anyways....i end up confronted at a party later on that evening at
> some othe rhouse somewhere. confronted by snapper, who is
> significantly smaller than me. but fiesty, ooo boy. .he called me out.
> i was a chump. all i could say was "was i speaking to you at the time?
> did i ever say anything directly to you?"yadda yadda.
> so yeah....i suck. sorry. thats my story and it embarrasses the christ
> out of me to think of it. i no longer hate so specifically, with such
> a knee jerk reaction. its much more general now.heh.